When I was pregnant with Adam I suffered from Hyperemesis Gravidarum – extreme pregnancy sickness. I had never heard of the condition and spent the pregnancy vomiting and being bed bound. I hid from the world. Only my immediate family saw me and therefore saw how ill I was. It wasn’t until Adam was born that I started to share my Hyperemesis story. However, one drawback of this is that I suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. How could people understand how ill I had been if I didn’t show them at the time.
When Adam was 7 weeks old I attended the Pregnancy Sickness Support conference and became a volunteer. Over the past 5 years I became a trustee of the charity and administered their online forum. Through meeting and talking with other sufferers I started to understand the condition and could in turn educate others about those 9 months.
I knew the chances of suffering from Hyperemesis Gravidarum again was very high. I went into this pregnancy prepared to face nine months of illness.However, this time I wanted to educate others during my pregnancy. I wanted to show what many many women go through behind closed doors whilst battling this condition. I decided to start an Instagram account – @hgreality – showcasing the reality of my HG pregnancy.
Here are the posts that I have copy and pasted from my Instagram account. However, if you go directly to my instragram page you are able to read the comments from other sufferers and survivors. Their comments further highlight how awful this condition is.
Hyperemesis Gravidarum Weeks 0-8
5th August (5 weeks pregnant)
I’ve been feeling sick for several weeks but put it down to the medication (Metformin) I was on for PCOS. I knew it would be too early for a pregnancy test but was shocked when it came out as pregnant
5th August (5 weeks pregnant)
I started on my first antisickness tablets. I saw my GP several months ago to put a Hyperemesis care plan in place which meant taking meds as soon as I got a positive pregnancy test.
7th August (5 weeks pregnant)
The nausea worsened over the weekend. Went to the gp and started on cyclizine. I made a trip to the supermarket to buy some pjs but ended completely exhausted. Adam knows I am poorly and keeps bringing me teddies and holding my hand.
9th August (6 weeks pregnant)
Struggled yesterday keeping anything down and then was violently ill all night. Went back to the GP who wanted to admit me. Back to the hospital where I spent my last pregnancy. Passed out when the granular went in.
9th August (6 weeks pregnant)
My HG baby came to visit me. Adam now knows about the baby and is extremely excited. He coped so well visiting in hospital with plenty of cuddles.
9th August (6 weeks pregnant)
Another bag of fluid. Still feeling incredibly sick.
10th August (6 weeks pregnant)
Our first scan. There was concerns I was only 3 weeks pregnant but relieved to find out I am 6 weeks. Wonderful to see a heartbeat too.
11th August (6 weeks pregnant)
Still in hospital. Ice cubes on a sponge stick is pure heaven!
11th August.(6 weeks pregnant)
My ketones are down so being discharged. Unfortunately it took 6 hours due to a mix up of meds.
12th August (6 weeks pregnant)
Chris has devised a way I can suck on ice without holding it! I have deteriorated quickly. The nausea is so intense.
13th August (6 weeks pregnant)
Last HG pregnancy I didn’t want anyone to see me. As a result very few people knew how ill I was. There are so many misconceptions with HG that it is just bad morning sickness. This is what HG looks like at 6 weeks. I am desperately trying to suck an ice cube but know it will come back up. We have put a single bed downstairs in our study. I am unable to climb stairs. I am bedbound already, haven’t showered for days and feel like hell.
15th August (6 weeks pregnant)
It feels a lifetime since I could be a proper mummy to Adam. He is coping so well and thanks to two wonderful friends he has been out and about on adventures. He suddenly seems so grown up.
17th August (7 weeks pregnant)
Nausea is so unrelenting and every hour drags. I had a midwife appointment yesterday who wanted to admit me to hospital but there were no beds. Hospital now wants 3+++ ketones in my urine before they will admit me. I am at breaking point.Frozen grapes and frozen melon is the only thing I have kept down for days.
18th August (7 weeks pregnant)
I finally got readmitted to hospital. It isn’t until you have a bag of fluids you realise how bad you were. All week I have been at breaking point. Despite being on 4 different types of antisickness drugs there was no let up in the nausea. As a result I was taking in less and less and my input/output was shocking. Keeping a fluid chart from Pregnancy Sickness Support helped no end to demonstrate how bad things are to the doctors. There is still an awful long way to go as I am only 7 weeks pregnant but so glad I don’t have to do that week again.
18th August (7 weeks pregnant)
The power of IV fluids. This afternoon I managed to eat solid food for the first time in a week. I took it slowly barely believing I could eat without vomiting or feeling sick. That was 4 hours ago. 1 hour ago my bag of iv fluid ran out and I’m waiting for the nurse to fit me a new one. I am back to clutching the sick bowl and gagging. Counting down the seconds to my next meds.
19th August (7 weeks pregnant)
My drip isn’t working still and as a result I am back to vomiting. Just seen the consultant who says I am severely dehydrated still. Please work cannula!
19th August (7 weeks pregnant)
Pulled the short straw on the biscuit front today. Thought I had been gingered!
19th August (7 weeks pregnant)
The struggle to get fluids is real. I have had one bag of iv fluid in the past 24 hours due to my cannula not working properly. This morning my ketones were 3+++. They are now negative and there was talk about discharging me. How can 2 bags since I’ve been admitted meant to have hydrated me after a week of no fluids?
I am struggling tonight with the battle to get what my body and baby needs. This morning the doctor was telling me I was severely dehydrated and now the ward says I should be able to hydrate myself. I hate ketones.
20th August (7 weeks pregnant)
I am being discharged today. Take your bets on how long I stay out of hospital?! Yet again there seems to be a discrepancy between what the consultant tells me and what the admission nurse expect in terms of dehydration for readmission so we shall see. Last hospitalisation they didn’t keep on top of meds, this time I could self medicate but I don’t feel I have had enough fluid. Time will tell
20th August (7 weeks pregnant)
I am now back home. Thankfully as I didn’t have to wait for any meds (as I have them all already) discharge didn’t take long. I’m feeling very weak and woozy but not vomiting and being able to eat.
Why does there have to be so many layers of things you have to fight for during an HG pregnancy?
Last pregnancy my fight was mostly centred around getting medication. This time my gp has been amazing, consultants in hospital are being great but I am having to fight for iv fluids.
I have lost count of the times I’ve been told “just keep yourself hydrated with water” – as if I haven’t kept myself alive all these years doing that simple task. If I could keep fluids down I wouldn’t be in hospital. To add salt to the wound I had to watch another patient (not pregnant) receive bag after bag of iv fluid because she had been nil by mouth. This morning she received an extra quick bag of fluids because she had been nil by mouth since 3am and didn’t have her breakfast until 10am. “Let’s just top you up just incase”. I haven’t eaten for a week and am trying to grow a baby yet I am only allowed 3 bags over three days? Time to recover my strength, prepare to fight another day and hope that I can keep on top of the hydration. Thankfully the stockings are off now!
21st August (7 weeks pregnant) Constipation
A grim side effect of Ondanstron and dehydration. Not just constipation but severe fecal impaction. I debated whether I should write about last night as I am so embarrassed and traumatised by what happened but this is the reality of HG.
I’ve been struggling taking Lactulose due to the taste and amount of liquid makes me vomit. When I was admitted to hospital on Friday the doctor prescribed a tablet form as I am fully aware of the side effects of Ondanstron thanks to my last pregnancy. However, I was never given the tablet during my hospital stay. I was too busy trying to fight for iv fluids I didn’t have the energy to fight for the constipation medication too. Unfortunately the result of actually eating in hospital and not going to the toilet for a week ended in disaster last night.
I had two episodes on the toilet last night lasting an hour each time. My bowel was so compacted that nothing would come out. There is no easy way to say this but I had to manually evacuate the compaction. The pain was so great I passed out.
So it is back to the doctors today to see how much damage was caused last night, get medication to ease the rest of the compaction and then get a longer term solution for the constipation as I know prevention is better than trying to resolve the issue.
To save my dignity I’m sharing a photo of my son’s attempt at decorating my sick bag to cheer me up!
22nd August (7 weeks pregnant)
I had a wonderful gift through the post today – a Guess How Much I Love You hare for bump.
HG is such a dark all encompassing place that you forget you are creating a baby. People congratulate me and I have to remind myself that something exciting is happening. Most of the time it is hard to see past the vomiting and nausea. So bump has their first present from their Auntie, Uncle and cousins and I will look at the hare to remind myself about the light at the end of the tunnel.
23rd August (8 weeks pregnant)
I had a wonderfully long cuddle from Adam this morning in bed. My son, who is normally so active and won’t sit still, laid with me and read me stories. He went and found his baby box and I showed him his “I survived Hyperemesis” baby grow. This baby grow helped me get through my last pregnancy. Surreal to think how big my first HG baby is now! I hope by being open about HG to Adam and that making him understand that I was the same with him will make things less scary for Adam.
Adam is now away for the next two days with my Mum. We booked an adventure to DiggerLand shortly before I fell pregnant which was non refundable. I’m sad that I won’t see his excited face on the rides tomorrow but we spent the morning talking about what adventures we will have once the baby is here. There is already talk about a “aeroplane holiday!”
24th August (8 weeks pregnant) Medication
I’ve had lots of messages asking me what medication I am on and if I have tried x or y. I have now been on this medication since my first hospitalisation. This is what is keeping me alive:
Ondensetron – currently 3 times a day but increasing
Domperidone – 3 times a day
Cyclizine – 3 times a day
Prochloroperazine Buccal – once a day as they knock me out completely
Dispersible aspirin – to limit Pre-Eclampsia I had last time
Ranitidine – for acid reflux
Senna Tablets – two tablets for constipation
Suppositories – as and when needed for severe constipation.
Just like last pregnancy I take them all everywhere with me in a vanity case. I once got caught out as there was an accident on the way home from a doctors appointment and I missed out on medication. Took me so long to recover. I have alarms that go off on my phone every two hours to tell me what to take. Despite all this medication I have been unable to keep any food down and more importantly any fluid down all day. Hospital is in the horizon again.
25th August (8 weeks pregnant)
Back in hospital again
26th August (8 weeks pregnant)
I watched these trees change through the seasons when I was pregnant with Adam. This hospital stay I got to watch the same trees again. I opted for a late shower today after waiting for the doctor (who never came). I vomited throughout the shower due to being out of bed. I asked for two hours for my fluids to be reattached. However because my ketones were low before the shower they wouldn’t reattach the fluids. I now know the system. They see how long you can go eating and drinking by yourself and then discharge you. I asked to be discharged early so that I can go home and attempt to start my routine before I deteriorate. I struggle in hospital with the three meals a day and nothing in between. I can lessen my symptoms if I eat little and often. Let’s see if I can beat my 5 day readmission target!
27th August (8 weeks pregnant) This is the power of IV fluids.
Today was a miracle day. I went to the beach! It was a mammoth operation but I got to watch my son throw stones in the sea. This is the power of being hydrated with iv fluids in hospital yesterday, of being able to keep my anti sickness tablets down and eating little and often. My parents have rented a cottage on the North Norfolk coast for the week. As my husband is on a stag weekend I didn’t have anyone to look after me. So Adam and I have come to North Norfolk. Mum has hired a wheelchair for a month in the hope that I can still get out and about.
I did nothing except get some clothes on and sit in a wheelchair but I feel as if I have run a marathon!
Another positive – due to sheer determination last night I managed to get three weeks worth of poo out. I have never know constipation like this. I feel so much better for it – although part of my dignity died when I managed to block the cottage toilet. Here is hoping for a nausea free evening.
28th August (8 weeks pregnant)
Another miracle – I managed another trip out of the house! This wheelchair is a godsend!
I spent all morning asleep recovering from yesterday’s adventure. My husband arrived at the holiday cottage from his stag weekend this afternoon so the three of us ventured into Tescos. I have been desperately trying to find fluids that will stay down so I attempted the supermarket. It was sensory overload but my husband pushed me in the wheelchair and Adam did a marvellous job with the trolley. We purchased practically every fizzy drink going.
Afterwards we went to Sheringham steam train station for an ice cream. I was only out of the cottage for under two hours but this evening I have paid the price. The sickness has returned but evenings have always been my hardest time. Now hoping my late night medication kicks in and sends me to sleep. I am savouring the drowsiness of the medication because I remember the insomnia that will start soon.
30th August (9 weeks pregnant)
Yesterday I managed another day trip to Wells. It has given me a new appreciation on how difficult life in a wheelchair is. Such limited access. Yesterday I got to watch Adam build a sandcastle and play in the sea in between sleeping off my medication. Sadly last night the severe constipation struck again. I have a feeling this Instagram should be called the poo diary. It was so severe last night that it felt that I had prolapsed in both areas. Today I’ve had a two hour trip to the GP to get it checked out. All is ok but I fear I am doing some serious long term damage. The GP wasn’t particularly helpful and gave me Dioralyte to help with the fluids. Yesterday I managed to drink 500ml – my record so far! The car journey has taken it out of me so back in bed.
You can read the rest of my Hyperemesis Gravidarum Diary by clicking on the links below:
- Emma’s HG Diary week 0-8
- Emma’s HG Diary week 9-12
- Emma’s HG Diary week 19-25
Emma’s HG Diary Weeks 0 – 8
Weeks 9 – 12
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